As we grow up, we encounter countless messages telling us that we're not good enough as we are - or that we should change in some way. Often, these messages are conveyed in harsh and unkind ways. If this negativity continues, it gradually shapes our minds to automatically produce self-policing, annoying, negative thoughts. This is why it’s crucial to cut off negative people from our lives.
If your mind is clouded with such negativity and you want to change it, understanding these important truths can help:
1. People’s Opinions Don’t Define You:
People's opinions of you do not have to dictate your opinion of yourself - recognise that external judgements are just that - external.
2. The Ultimate Opinion is Divine:
The only true opinion of you is God’s - even your own opinion of yourself can be skewed by your ego. Seeking divine understanding can provide a clearer, more positive perspective.
3. You Are Not Your Mind:
You are not your mind - you are what observes the mind. This distinction helps in separating your true self from the negative thoughts that arise.
4. Challenge Negative Thoughts:
Negative thoughts can be challenged - and doing so gradually weakens their hold over you. Question the validity of these thoughts and replace them with positive affirmations.
5. Love Yourself Despite Negativity:
It’s wise to love yourself despite having a mind that is adept at producing negative thoughts - self-love isn’t about eliminating negativity but embracing yourself in spite of it.
6. Practise Acceptance:
Practising the art of not desiring things to change strengthens our ability to sit in perfect peace. Can you sit in a cold rainstorm in a traffic jam and purposefully not desire the situation to change? Can you sit in a room feeling a sense of agitation and not desire things to change?
Simply not desiring things immediately brings about peace - because desire is what cuts our peace off.
Apply this mindset to yourself, and you will cultivate self-love.
A cloud is not perfect, but it also is. A cloud has lots of irregular, squiggly bits. It can’t look like this ‘perfect’ cartoon cloud: ☁️
It’s the same with us. We can’t ever be ‘perfect’, but we are completely perfect as we are.
Imagine looking at a tree and being annoyed because it doesn’t look like a cartoon tree. One of the effects of being disconnected from nature is that we stop looking at ourselves as being part of nature - and therefore we lose touch with how perfectly imperfect we are.
When love and happiness are generated from within, without the need for external validation, we have unlimited access to love. This is because external conditions limit our access to love. You might have only loved yourself when you performed well, were muscular, wealthy, or met some other condition - discard these reasons and simply love yourself.
Why care what other people think? Anyone who hates on you has major self-love problems, anyway. People who are comfortable bringing others down are not people you want to emulate - so their opinions should not matter to you.
Don’t worry about other people’s standards that you may or may not meet - you are you, and you are perfectly imperfect, just like the rest of us. We are all parts of nature.
Embracing these truths and practising self-love will pave the way to inner peace and authentic happiness. Use this information and let it affect your thoughts and actions, then it will be useful to you. Enjoy it,
David
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